By Dr. Hannah Force Conry, DC
“Put on your own oxygen mask first before assisting those around you.”
“You cannot serve from an empty cup.”
“How will anyone else love you if you cannot love yourself?”
We have heard them all. And yet we do not heed the wisdom. It is almost a badge of honor these days to point out all our own foibles, flaws, and things we could have done better. As though self criticism (or tough love) were the only way to self improvement.
What would it feel like to take yourself on a date? What would it feel like to say all of the things you long to hear from another to yourself? What would it feel like to be your own best friend?
The only thing we have control of in this life is ourselves! Yet, we bash ourselves everyday for perceived wrong doings, for flaws in our form or personality, worrying about the past and the future. We would never be friends with that person, and we are that person! We have been taught to play small and not stand out. Don’t make waves.
Personally, I am ready for this BS to end. It is time for all of us to embrace who we are, all of it. This does not get us off the hook for making change in our life where necessary. Lasting change happens through recognition and baby steps forward to where we want to be. Not by coercion and punishment! Guided by love, self love, we unfold to the truest expression of ourselves and we know our place and our purpose in this world.
Acts of Self Love
~Become your own best friend
~Give yourself a compliment! (I promise it is not big headed)
~Look in the mirror with gratitude for this life and its lessons and admire every inch of yourself
~Drink water to feed your cells
~Eat for nourishment and pleasure (never from a place of obligation or numbing)
~Read a book for fun and cry, laugh, feel free to express what comes up
~Move your body for the sheer joy of having a body (never as punishment)
~Say “no” when it feels right
~Say “yes” to what lights you up
Out beyond the ideas of right doing and wrong doing there is a field. I will meet you there. ~Rumi
Letting go of our judgements (petty, self, other) we find ourselves in a place where true growth and self love are possible. That is my dream for all of us. Fall in love with yourself so that you can truly love and be loved by another.
I encourage you to find the joy in every single day by starting when you wake with a “good morning beautiful/handsome/vibrant, sparkly being/any other kind word that resonates with you!” And move into your day with purpose and self love.